I Ηate Irony
I was walking along one day when I realized that I hate irony
I think I was thinking of the movie The Shining and how scary it is
When I was 21, I didn’t sleep for two nights straight because of that movie
It reminded me a lot of growing up and the things I’ve seen
Fear is not irony
If you have ever been truly scared there is no irony in your voice when you scream
And too
Love is not either
I was in love once and all I could think of was joy
Not drinking, nor sex, or spaghetti
Not witty things to say or martinis
That bubble down the stairs with gracious olives
I didn’t think of my large grey turtleneck folding over my abdomen
As I was touched so quietly by the stars
I hate when people think they are being funny by being ironic
Or they want to show you they are clever
So they say something really meaty
With twists and curves
I don’t think it is funny to be so elitist
To everyone who hasn’t had the chance to be as special as you are
Being cultivated into fine things when you yourself was nothing to begin with
Humor is not irony as I belly laugh all along the bench
Of the waiting room while they announce my father will die
Or when my friend was killed by her husband while he wore all black
To be torched is not ironic, but it hurts
It hurt her flesh. It hurts me to think about it.
And not precious I am to think about it, to give it time
O but Dottie, you say, you are so funny
Surely you realize you are always being ironic
But I am not, I will tell you
I am only being real
Dorothea Lasky
